"I do not doubt that you will say such a thing by the end of the evening."

"Pee! Bowl! Dance!" -Todd, me, Micah (respectively) on what I like to do in alleys

"Cowboy boots! Sweat pants! Cowboy boots!" -Micah

"I might be drunk, but I still use big words!" -LT

"I KNOW! Right?! Right?"

"That chic must be a sister wife. I don't even know what the eff that is." -Kevin on Dorothy

"Is this appropriate to show my nieces?" -Kevin on photos

"Well, what if they took the picture?"

"I mean, I hope I'm not an airhead. But sometimes I wonder if I should be thinking more." -LT

"I'm sorry, I don't serve that purpose in your life. Call an old girlfriend." -Walter on reliving the past

"Look around and find a hipster. Well, Jill's a hipster." -Robin on skinny jeans

"Cart him around, like an accessory." -Lizzie on artists

"'Cuz it's Friendsgiving." -Kevin on fashion choices

"It would be better warm. But I'm not gonna stop." -Laura on eating

"He sounded about as clear as our President." -LT on State of the Unions